Hey folks. I know that since all you think about is me you must have been worried about where I've been. Have no fear. The CIA has not been able to stop me. They only have circumstansial evidence. Heh. Suckers. So I'm back to give you your daily dose of the truth about the government. Like how they're watching you RIGHT. NOW. And since you're reading the ramblings of a rebel like yours truly, they'll really be on to you. Watch your back, yo.

Looking back on old entries (which I often do, seeing as how I love myself), I realize how freakin bitter I sound. This is a shame. I'm a happy person. Ya know, most of the time. When I don't look in a mirror or think about my life. Outside of that? Good times. Good times. So today, for your viewing enjoyment, after leaving you for two days with an especially bitter entry, I decided to make a list of all the things that have made me happy today.

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-I woke up this morning with a song from Chicago in my head. Ren�e Zellweger's voice is the breakfast of champions.

-Having nice cool weather here in Gainesville, FL

-Making fun(in my head, of course) of the guy in the poster on the bulletin board next to the seat I always sit in during math. The guy has his arms at his waist in a total superhero pose and it's a poster for a medical school in the West Indies.

-Finding a key I thought I had lost. This was a very very very big deal. You see, your old friend Sarah had recently gone through the ordeal of losing a set of keys. Not only was it awful, but it cost me(read:my mom) $42.50. (42 motherfucking 50!!! I HATE THIS SCHOOL!) To lose another key(this time it was just one of the three I had) after two days of getting a new set did not bode well with me. And by "not bode well" I mean that I was screaming and crying and could barely breathe. I could NOT believe this was happening. I was so totally apeshitcrazygonuts insane with rage at myself for letting this happen that at one point I literally ATTEMPTED TO GOUGE MY EYES OUT. No. Seriously. ...I may have overreacted. I had made sure to put them in a place where I was sure that something EXACTLY LIKE THIS wouldn't happen. I started to do other things and halfway through that I check said secure location "just to make sure" and I can't find one of the keys. I destroy my room looking for it. After giving up hope, I resign myself to defeat because by that point it was high time for me to start heading off to my next class. Then I look in my backpack(the secure location) and there's this part I'd never seen before. It's hard to describe so I'm not gonna attempt to, but suffice it to say the key had nestled itself in that compartment I'd never seen before. Whatever. The point is that I found it, and I practically pissed myself with relief.

-Noticing a cute guy in Latin I had never seen before

-Being told we don't have a quiz in Latin on Thursday

-Having the resident bitchy sorority girl of Latin class raise her hand all self-assured to answer a question and then having it totally be wrong. Heh heh. (I'm petty. Very very petty.)

-Having to read only two pages for my lit class, when usually we have to read...50.

-Hearing my art history professor say "the proportions are disgusting!" in total Queer Eye fashion.

-Having to look at a nude male sculpture the entire class. Granted, there was nothing to brag about, but a penis is a penis.

-Learning this interesting bit of trivia:every nude male sculpture in the Vatican's collection has a fig leaf covering its twigs and berries, even if it wasn't originally made that way. Crazy Catholics.

-Seeing a flyer that Mallory from The Real World:Paris will be coming to town. Not that I'm a big fan of Mallory or anything, but she's a much cooler guest than the psuedo celebrities we had visit the town I grew up in...which was no one.

-Going to aforementioned lit class for a two hour block and spending the entire time talking about sex. Yadda yadda yadda orgasm orgasm orgasm. Yadda yadda yadda lesbians lesbians lesbians. Yadda yadda yadda anal sex anal sex anal sex. Ohhhh yes. I love this class. Apparantly, teacher is a firm believer that everything ever written in the history of the world is about sex, some are just more well hidden than others. It makes for very very fun discussions. *Especially when teacher is wearing knee-high leather boots and a skirt short enough to give you a clue as to whether or not she is a real redhead and...

Ahem. Moving on.

*=Author's note: No, lit teacher is not another girl crush. I was just joking(although that is what she was wearing today-she has the best fashion sense ever). She has far too many quirks and no sense of humor.

-*Having lit teacher say something about vampires that totally reminded me of a line from one of my favorite episodes of X-Files. It was especially amusing since, as mentioned previously, she has red hair and the line talks about some cultures believing that's a sign of a vampire.

*=Author's note:This happiness was quickly shot down when it hit me that I am the single biggest geek that has ever walked the face of the Earth.

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And the night is still young folks! Oh yes. Although the night is pretty much over for me. I have a massive headache so I'm just going to shower, swallow a bottle of pills, and sleep until... winter. So au revoir mes amis. I love you all. And I hope your day is going as well as mine.

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